In the news out of Imaginary Land, Tank Abbott thinks he can knock out Brock Lesnar in 10 seconds.

Don’t believe me? Just listen to the man himself, courtesy of FightGameTV.com

Oh Tank.

Let’s not forget this is a guy that has a 10-14 career record and was submitted by Frank Mir from a toe hold.

Abbott could knock out Brock Lesnar if Lesnar stood still and let Tank get one clean shot. Other than that, it ain’t happening.

It would be like Royce Gracie saying he could submit Matt Hughes. Sure, if Hughes just laid on the ground like a dead fish. But, when the two actually got into the octagon together, it was another story.

Hey Tank, I think Tim Sylvia is looking for an opponent. Maybe you can still knock him out in a real fight.

Just when it looked like the UFC might go all nostalgia at UFC 134 in Brazil with a bout featuring Royce Gracie, Dana White nixed the idea (MMAFighting.com).

But with names like Dan Severn and Art Jimmerson being thrown around lately, it made me think of the past and weird fights that I have always wanted to see for one reason or another.

Here are some fights that I would pay to see if the UFC deeply cared to entertain me:

Tank Abbott vs. Roy Nelson – Roy Nelson is what Tank Abbott should have been. Abbott has always been a fan favorite, yet is one of the worst fighters I have ever seen. At 10-14, Abbott was good for about 30 seconds of haymakers and then he gassed out. Nelson, who has a similar shape, is actually pretty impressive at grappling and jiu-jitsu, and he hits even harder than Tank. I would love to see Nelson toy with Abbott and then rub his giant belly in celebration.

Matt Hughes vs. Mark Hughes – Who better to match strength with Matt Hughes than his twin brother Mark? Mark has dipped into the MMA world, as he has a 6-2 record in his career. Granted, he hasn’t fought since 2003, but it was just be interesting to see the UFC find a way to pit twin brothers against one another. Would they both come out to “Country Boy Can Survive?”

Hong Man Choi vs. Jose Aldo – Granted Choi would have the size edge at 7-foot-2, 352-pounds, but I think the UFC featherweight champion (145 pounds, 5-7) can take him. I would love to see Jose speed around Choi and pepper him with leg kicks until the 7-footer comes crashing down like a giant oak tree.

Jose Canseco vs. Johnnie Morton – This is a must-see match. Both are former athletes. Both are 0-1 in their career. And both men lasted less than 90 seconds in their fight. Oh, and both men use steroids. It is a perfect match. Which man will be able to out-juice the other and get their first MMA victory?

Wesley Snipes vs. Joe Rogan – It has been a fight that has been talked about before, and I know Rogan would be down to fight. What better way to truly win over the fan base than seeing Rogan put a beat down on Snipes?

The rumors have been swirling in the MMA community that Royce Gracie will be taking part in the upcoming UFC 134 event that will be held in Brazil.

With the Hall of Famer gearing up for the bout, the question has been, who will be fighting Gracie?

Gracie hasn’t competed since June of 2007 and his most notable fight came in May of 2006 when he was dominated by Matt Hughes at UFC 60

If the UFC is really going to trot Gracie into the octagon in his home country, they need to give him an opponent he can beat.

Well, have no fear UFC, as plenty of elderly fighters seem to want that fight.

It started with Art Jimmerson tossing his name into the hat. You remember Art Jimmerson, he was the guy that fought Gracie at the first UFC with one boxing glove on. A game plan that sharp hasn’t been seen since. Gracie quickly submitted Jimmerson and began his Hall of Fame legacy.

Now, former UFC champion, Dan Severn, wants a piece of the action. Severn, who is now 52-years-old, has been competing regularly in smaller MMA shows. He is requesting a retirement match with Gracie at UFC 134.

Gracie submitted Severn at UFC 4 and the wrestler has been looking for a rematch ever since.

This situation has become a bit of a mess. I respect the UFC wanting to pay respect to Gracie, but he is simply not a fighter that is capable of fighting at a high level, and his opponent surely won’t be able to either.

A fight featuring Gracie can still draw as he is a legend with a fan base, but hopefully the UFC won’t be looking to make any more of these bouts any time soon.